As e e cummings wrote:
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
And for me right now that root of the root, bud of the bud is that I am faced with the challenge of emptying and selling the house that has been in my family since 1884. My dreams have been filled with me trying to move history books too large to hold, of lifting ancient tablets, of losing seashells in the surf.
Today I had to talk about getting rid of furniture and giving away clothes and what can be thrown out. But every day I walked into that house and that furniture, those clothes, those superficial things, brought me comfort. I can’t even walk in there.
Ah grief.
I carry your heart, Gogo. I carry it in my heart.
